A Little Too Analytical

Hey guys,

It’s Sunday night. Well, honestly, it’s more like Monday morning. I had so many thoughts today, so many ideas and realizations, so many that the only way I could share them was through my screen.

Do you ever realize certain people aren’t who you think they are? You have this idea in mind. This idea that this person is “a”, “b” and”c”. This idea that gives you a sense of comfort. You’ve given them an identity, an identity that you love (I mean, why else would you be friends with them?) Yet, week by week, things unfold and you see sides of them that melt down those ideas you first had about them. It’s hard to put into words. These moments are subtle, usually. They go almost unnoticed. The person probably doesn’t even know that you notice these things, to be completely honest. But these moments are so powerful. They’re powerful because they reveal to us the true character of these people we surround ourselves with.

On a positive note, these moments can be unbelievably incredible. They can show you how much someone cares about you. They can show you the way someone feels about you within seconds. A simple look, a tiny action…these tiny snapshots say so much. It’s hard for me to give examples without being too specific, so instead I’ll try to come up with some examples.

Example 1: You see someone text your friend, but they don’t know you saw. They then either all of a sudden rush your hangout or attempt to hide this message.

-It’s actions like this that say SO much about someone. I truly cannot even put into words how impactful these few seconds are. It’s like, in less than a minute, they’ve showed you how valuable you are to them.

Last week I read an article that changed my life. It’s an article by Mark Manson called “Fuck Yes or No”. Here’s a link – https://markmanson.net/fuck-yes. Basically, he lays down one of the most important laws you’ll ever hear. It’s the law of fuck yes or no. It states…

The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” states that when you want to get involved with someone new, in whatever capacity, they must inspire you to say “Fuck Yes” in order for you to proceed with them.

The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” also states that when you want to get involved with someone new, in whatever capacity, THEY must respond with a “Fuck Yes” in order for you to proceed with them.”

I LOVE this law. I love it because it reminds me how valuable I am. Often times, we settle. We settle because why convince ourselves that it’s good enough, or that our expectations are too high, or maybe because we’re scared to be alone. We want attention. That’s just how we are as humans. We want people to tell us how important and loved we are. However, we need to believe this ourselves first. We need to know this. It needs to be engraved in us before we dive into new friendships, relationships or whatever else it is the kids do these days.

Think about it, why would you ever want to be with someone (friendship or relationship) if they don’t want to be with you equally as much?

Today, I was talking to a “friend” and I was explaining something I was SO passionate about to this person. They then said I was talking too fast and that it was giving them anxiety. In this moment I knew it clearly wasn’t a “fuck yes” from them. I realized, “holy shit..I’m spilling out my soul to this person and they’re not even excited”. Instantly it turned into a “fuck no” from me because I remembered my value. I am an incredibly smart, creative and passionate person and I have zero problem admitting it. I know there are so many people that would sit with me and talk about the things I love for hours, so why would I settle for someone that’s barely listening?

Also, my personality type is “ENTJ-A”. You can take a personality quiz here – https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test. ENTJ is the rarest personality, and to be honest I don’t doubt it. I’m pretty psychotic some may say. I just think I’m passionate, inspired and incredibly ambitious. Here are some tidbits that describe the ENTJ personality type:

“ENTJs are natural-born leaders. People with this personality type embody the gifts of charisma and confidence, and project authority in a way that draws crowds together behind a common goal.”

“Perhaps it is best that they make up only three percent of the population, lest they overwhelm the more timid and sensitive personality types that make up much of the rest of the world – but we have ENTJs to thank for many of the businesses and institutions we take for granted every day.”

“If there’s anything ENTJs love, it’s a good challenge, big or small, and they firmly believe that given enough time and resources, they can achieve any goal.”

“ENTJs are true powerhouses, and they cultivate an image of being larger than life – and often enough they are. They need to remember though, that their stature comes not just from their own actions, but from the actions of the team that props them up, and that it’s important to recognize the contributions, talents and needs, especially from an emotional perspective, of their support network.”

Basically, if people don’t recognize my immense creative power and innovative mind I honestly don’t have time for them. I don’t have time to spend with people who aren’t driven, compassionate and inspired. I also don’t have time to spend with people who don’t appreciate me.

So today, I realized I was done with people like that. I’m done with people who don’t recognize or appreciate the incredible person/friend I am. I’m done with people who show me (although they may not even know it) their true character or true intentions.

Remember how important you are. Remember how valuable you are. Remember how there are HUNDREDS of people who would be so inspired by you. There are HUNDREDS of people that would be so unbelievably happy to spend time with you. So, if your “friend” scrolls through Twitter when you’re pouring your heart out, stop talking and continue your conversation elsewhere. You can even start here. I would love to talk with you. I love you. So many people love you. There are people right now who are eager to even BEGIN to love you. So remember you are loved, and you are passionate for a reason. Share your ideas, the world wants to hear them.

PS – Next time your friend is pouring HER (or his) heart out to you, listen. Listen because people don’t share their passions with just anybody. If you don’t listen someone else will.

XO,

PB

43 thoughts on “A Little Too Analytical

    1. Hi Polina, big kisses from Slovakia (Coco included 😄). Thanks for sharing your lifestyle, feelings, ideas… Go mam, go! Do not let anybody to break you. I think of you and send lots of positive energy.

  1. Love this post. I completely agree…our time is valuable & so are we…so why spend it with people who don’t appreciate you or are just uninterested?

    You should set up a newsletter!! Would love to get email updates <3

  2. Thank you for the inspiration and positivity you bring to the world. I really love seeing an in depth raw side of you. I’ve loved your videos for years and you have something about you that I feel like draws people to you, it’s probably all your passion and ambition ! Keep it up, I aspire to be as motivated and successful as you are (:

  3. Hey Polina, it’s crazy but I feel like I can really relate to you and we share a lot of similar interests. I am also a very passionate and creative person and I often realize that some of my friends don’t care about it or are jealous because they are different.
    I don’t care whether my friends share the exact same interests as I do, what I love about them is that they are all so different. However, lately I have also been struggling with my friendships because it makes very sad to feel like, I am always the one who gives more.
    To me a friendship is a very important relationship. You tell these people so much about you and even more than that. You share your deepest fears, dreams and thoughts. But at end of the day we are all human beings who make mistakes and some people don’t know what have until it’s gone. You surely deserve people who support, listen and love you!

    Loved this post <3

  4. I absolutely love this. I especially loved your last paragraph, nobody should spend time with people who just don’t care to listen. Life’s too short to have it spent with people who don’t care about YOU!

  5. I took the personality test and got ENFP-T, a campaigner. 7% of the population. It was saying campaigners crave freedom and thrive on ideas. It was crazy how creepily accurate that test was.

    And on your post, I definitely need to keep that in mind. We shouldn’t waste a second on anyone who doesn’t deserve the time.
    Thanks for sharing!

  6. I really loved this Polina! I even teared up at the end. I struggle with not realizing my importance and I think many of us do. So putting this information out there can really help people that think otherwise about themselves. 🙂

  7. i love watching your youtube videos, honestly they make my day. i just have been going through so much stress so much of everything and it really makes me so happy to read on more of the positive or just generally real shit. you are beautiful inside and out and i love you so much! thank you for making this blog its helping to give me the little push towards more self love ❤️

  8. Polina I literally love you so much! I’ve watched you on youtube since I believe you were a junior in high school and it’s just so incredible how much you’ve grown since then. I’m a year younger than you and you’re such an inspiration for me! It’s so refreshing to see someone who is so confident and self-loving like you are. It really shows younger girls that they can be strong women and not accept anything less than they deserve in this world. I’m so excited for this blog and hope that you get everything out of it that you could ever hope to!

  9. Love this so much Polina. You are my role model and constant inspiration. You have helped me so much. With every new blog post, my connection to you feels even stronger. Never stop writing. You are truly such a beautiful person…

  10. I teared up reading this. I needed to hear that and I know that’s exactly why you wrote it. For the people who need to hear it. So thanks so much Polina, you inspire me!!

  11. I’m loving these posts. I feel the same way. I put my all to being a good friend/person and I deserve the same respect back.

  12. It might sound crazy, but I asked for a sign during my mediation and I came upon reading this. This is so heart warming and beautiful. I really needed to hear this, and I’m glad it was from someone as amazing as you. Thank You Polina, you have inspired me to have some self worth in the person I am. You’re an amazing writer,i hope great things come your way.

  13. Hey Polina ,
    I really resonated with this post a lot.
    I’m 22 , besides my fiancé I keep my group of “friends” rather small. I really only have about 4 girls that I would consider my friends. And this is for the same reason as you, I don’t have the time nor do I want to waste my time on people who genuinely don’t care about me or what I have to say.
    There are certain things that I feel so wildly passionate about, and if I’m gonna take the time to tell you about these things and you’re not going to listen , then I don’t need you in my life. Bye Felicia ✋🏼
    I wouldn’t consider myself to be too creative necessarily but I am a very strong, dedicated, and passionate being. I think it’s really hard, as you must have noticed, to find other individuals with this same time of personality.

    Just reading your post right now , I feel very, I don’t know, inspired to write as well.

    I look forward to reading and commenting on more of your future posts.

    Till then, xoxo

  14. I took the personality quiz and got the same result. I figured I’d get the same result based on the description you provided. I think the reason I enjoy keeping up with your YT and other social media is how much I can relate to you.

  15. I took the personality test and got ENTJ-A as well. I kind of expected that because after reading all of your blog posts I realized we have a very similar view point on life. I think that’s what draws me to you the most, you’re totally someone that I relate to. Lots of love💕

  16. Your blog posts are JUST as honest as your vlogs and other videos. It’s absolutely amazing relating to someone who thinks and is inspired by the same things as I am. I’m so glad I subscribed to your channel and started checking our your blog posts. Thank you for being my inspiration and inspiring me everyday. I now know I need to live by this philosophy because some people just aren’t worth having in my life if they’re just going to bring me down.

  17. Hey Polina,

    I felt mind blown reading this because I am also a ENTJ. There are more of us out there!!! whoop whoop!

    Reading this I felt connected to you on a whole other level. I am passionate beyond belief and it is incredibly hard to find people at age 20 who care about things that go beyond themselves who can even begin to understand why I am so intense about things. I have had best friends do as you described in your post, and it always makes me feel the same way. I have learned to have a very small ‘inner’ circle and it usually always comes down to my parents that I am the realest with about my passions and inspirations. It is something that I am so proud of and at times feel …like you said, psychotic about. Thank you for having a beautiful soul, I appreciate you so much!

  18. Your an amazing inspiring person, I’ve been watching you every since you first started YouTube. I used to watch your videos over and over again. Now you’ve inspired me to make my own YouTube channel and much more! I love seeing this side of you, its reminds me a lot of how I feel… Keep up the AMAZING work

  19. I think now a days people just want to “be popular”. To them it’s more important to have quantity over quality. They lack that one or two people that will REALLY listen and comprehened when needed. Honestly, this is quite sad. Who are they going to talk to when they are faced with a problem? Who will be their shoulder to cry on? And who will be there to congratulate them when they have an accomplishment? The answer is no one: they’re alone in this world.
    -kate
    Katekoutures.blogspot.com

  20. I loved this, Polina! I’m glad for this new outlet of yours, and you really are an amazing writer! I already love getting to know this side of you as well, aside from your YT videos and vlogs and all.

  21. I really like this post. I feel the exact same way sometimes about other people. Like when I’m talking to someone about what I truly am passionate about and they seem like they don’t care.

  22. I respect this post so much! Thank you for sharing this new outlook you have. I, too, have gone through similar experiences that have made me realize who I need to surround myself with. We need to be around people who not only say that they appreciate and care for us, but show us that they do. It’s off putting knowing that people you value deeply don’t feel for you the way they feel for them, but honestly, it’s a relief to know who you truly should be spending your time and effort with. Perhaps it’s my personality type, ESFJ, that makes me put my all into people regardless, and unfortunately I can be very sensitive.

  23. Polina, I absolutely adore your writing, you’re so talented! I relate to this post so much, I recently realized how much I was putting into one of my friendships for nothing in return but I was so scared because I don’t really have friends (my best friend lives 6 hrs away) but I feel so much more confident that there will be Simone out there that will care at some point and I shouldn’t be draining my energy on someone who doesn’t care because of how long ago our friendship started. You really do make me a better person and I’ve started to love myself so much more. Thank you so much for everything I love you 💖

  24. such an awesome blog post!! really needed to hear this, I completely agree on what you had to say. Keep doing you girl, love you

  25. Polina, I love your blog, you are truly amazing, and I can really relate. I have had the same experience with friendship, with people not listening and not caring about what you have to say. I have found really good friends now, and am so happy to hear that someone has gone through the same thing as me. Love you so much❤

  26. Polina,

    Ha, it’s like 4am and I have to be up at 6 to go to work but for some craycray reason I woke up, and well, what else to do at this time but watch vlogs. I have been watching your YouTube since I was a freshman in high school (gossipgirl inspired school looks) Whenever I was in a style slump I would go to your channel for some inspiration and I’ve always thought you live such an interesting and enchanted life. I LOVE the personal growth that I’ve seen in your channel, vlogs, and now blogs. I love how comfortable and confident you are in your videos, your passion is inspiring to say the least. A lot of life changes and realizations have been happening in my life as well, especially in the last year. First of all, in February I went vegan. It was actually a really traumatic experience for me and I was angry at the world for hiding the cruelty put unto animals. I felt alone, and all my friends thought I was crazy, but it was something that I felt so incredibly passionate about. Then, not long after I was watching your vlogs and saw that you were also experimenting with veganism. I just could not believe it! My favorite (and only) person I watch on YouTube was interested in something that I also felt so strongly about. Since then I’ve been watching your videos more regularly. I used to just watch them to steal your on fleek style, but now I watch the vlogs more. I just finished watching your video about astrology, and again I was in giddy disbelief and had to send a snapchat of the video to one of my best friends ( she’s a fuckyes girl) My friend had maybe a month ago introduced me to astrology. For her 18th birthday her mom bought her a reading and then my friend shared it with me. I could NOT believe the accuracy! Like this chart was LITERALLY my friend in a nutshell. She has since encouraged me to get one, but like you said in your video they tend to be pricey, and homegirl is trying to pay for college so ya know… You mentioned in your video that after you finish your class that giving readings would be something you’d like to do, which I think would be so amazing, especially coming from somebody like you who is so inspiring. You really are a rare gem just like an ENTJ would be. But I also know how hard that can be when you want to be great, feel great, and do great, and the others around you don’t have the same tenacity that you do. I struggle with that same feeling which relates to another crazy coincidence we have in common. It was literally like last month I discovered the Myers Briggs test with a friend. Upon taking the test I found out that I’m an INFJ, another very rare personality type. But to me, like you said, it made sense to me that it’s rare because I don’t know a lot of people like me. It’s a hard feeling to be different, but like you, I know the importance of embracing yourself and practicing self love everyday.
    This has been a super long tangent but I felt that after watching your videos for so long that I wanted to reach out to you. You truly are an amazing and inspiring individual Polina, so thank you so much for putting yourself out there for us all to be inspired from.

    Much love from middle of nowhere Minnesota #alwaysjealousofyourLAlife
    – Twyla Marie

  27. Hi sweets
    OMG!!! i have no words its like you took them out of my mouth all i can say is (WOW GIRL!!)
    Love the post and LOVE YOU

    XOXO

    DM.

  28. Hi Polina! I came here from your YouTube channel and I’m so glad I did! You’re such an amazing writer and you make me think very deeply. You’re also so so down to Earth and loving. I took the personality test and I have an advocate personality (very rare, makes up about 1% of the population). This post hit me hard because I have been putting my all into a friendship and I have sometimes had the feeling that this person doesn’t care about me as much as she said she does. When I vent to her about my life anxieties she scrolls through instagram and it really bothers me. I was brought to tears by this blog post because I tend to under rate myself. I am worth true affection and worthwhile relationships. I am going to talk to my friend about how she makes me feel when I pour out my heart and she’s inattentive. I really do love her and I want our relationship to work out but if she doesn’t change then our relationship turns into a “fuck no”. I deserve true friends.
    Thanks again Polina. You inspire me and I love that.
    ♡Hailey

  29. Polina! You write beautifully, I am just catching up on your blog. I am in school and have a little one with a new house, so life is busy! I took the personality quiz and it said I’m an (ENFJ-A). I feel the results are so spot on.. Thank you for posting that link! Your blog is so inspirational and makes me want to re-start mine from years ago. I just poured my heart and, and some people didn’t appreciate that, they wanted beauty tips and such.. so I just stopped. Thanks for the kick in the butt! xoxo

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